Keep the Change
by Alan Cohen, Hawaii
As we move into autumn, some of us may feel wistful about leaving the sunnier, warmer, vacation-friendly days behind. We may also be facing unwanted changes in our life, like the ending of a friendship or romantic relationship, job transition or loss, or the passing of a dear person or pet. It can be hard to see people and things we love move out of our world.
Yet, navigated wisely, such changes can be highly empowering. A Course in Miracles tells us that all change is helpful. When we upgrade our vision to welcome change instead of resist it, transitions become our friends.
When I first moved to a house in the country, I found a rat marauding our pantry. I purchased a no-kill trap, baited it with peanut butter, and set it out before I went to bed. Sure enough, the next morning, a little gray rodent was scampering about the cage. I took the cage to an empty field, and opened the door for the rat to escape. To my surprise, rather than jumping out of the cage, the rat scurried to the back of the cage and tried to hide there. I shook the cage again, but the rat continued to cling to the device. Finally I tilted the cage, gave it a hard shake, and the rat jump out and dashed away into the field.
We humans are more like that rat than we care to admit. We get stuck in routines and stay in relationships, jobs, and living situations that are more oppressive than rewarding. We pray to be released, but then when a gate opens, we run back to hide in the cage as if it is giving us solace. We don’t realize that the universe is pushing us to freedom. If we can reframe the change as a doorway to greater good, we won’t have to hide in the familiar.
My friend Brad was going through a painful divorce. The issue that split the couple was children. Brad wanted a family, and his wife did not. He felt torn between his love for his wife and his desire to be a dad. After much discussion, the couple decided to part. Brad felt devastated. Yet as a Course in Miracles student, he realized his predicament was an opportunity to practice trusting. He took a packet of computer printer papers and wrote TRUST in big, bold letters on each page. Then he spread out the papers on the floor, forming a kind of bed, and he lay down on it. This act gave him a sense of solace and relief.
Within the following year, Brad met a lovely woman named Hannah, and felt a deep resonance with her. As the two got to know each other, Brad realized that the values they shared ran deeper than those he had with his former wife. Like Brad, Hannah wanted a family. The two married and now they have two beautiful children whom they love dearly. Their life revolves around their family, which richly fulfills the couple.
If you feel troubled about how a difficult situation will turn out, you might adopt Brad’s trust exercise, either as a mental practice, or literally. Imagine that you are resting on a comfortable, supportive bed of trust. Even while the worried mind doubts and fears, the universe has your back. My teacher asked, “Where could you fall but into the arms of God? We can relate to God as a loving parent who wants only the best for us, and has the power to create miracles to sustain us. The exercise of resting on a bed of trust represents reality far more than imagination.
Trust becomes an especially valuable asset when you are faced with the appearance of rejection. I often use the maxim, “Rejection means protection.” If something is right for you, it will come naturally and organically. If a door closes, you are being redirected.
A while back, I had to find a new office space within a short time frame. In a town near me, I found a site that was okay, but not great. The rooms were small, the rent was high, and it was situated on the corner of a busy intersection. Under time pressure, I told the rental agent I would take it, and he promised to send me the rental contract.
When a few weeks went by and I did not hear from the agent, I phoned him and inquired. He informed me that the landlord had looked at one of my books, and he didn’t agree with my philosophy, so he would not rent to me. I asked the agent if this was legal, and he replied, “Probably not, but do you really want to fight it?” I decided instead to flow with the situation.
On my way home that day, a little voice in my head suggested I take the scenic route home, through a lush forest, rather than the regular route. Along the way I noticed a lovely storefront with a “For Rent” sign on it. When I inquired, the landlady told me that her last tenant used the space for a tai chi studio, and she would love to have me rent it. The place was the perfect size, at a fraction of the cost of the space where I was denied, and in a paradise-like location just minutes from my home—superior in every way than the rental that fell through. The landlord that rejected me was not a devil, but an angel guiding me to my right and perfect place.
In the immortal Tao te Ching, the sage Lao-Tse wrote, Tao abides in non-action, Yet nothing is left undone. “Non-action” means letting life be, and trusting that when you relax and allow what wants to happen to happen, you will find far more success than trying to micro-manage life. Change, it turns out, is not our enemy, but our friend guiding us to greater good.
Alan Cohen is the author of many popular books, including the new bestseller Miracle Actually. Join Alan for A Course in Miracles retreat in Hawaii, February 23-27, 2026. For information on this program, Alan’s books, ACIM video course, weekly online Miracle Room, webinars, YouTube channel, and free daily inspirational quotes, visit www.alancohen.com.
